The Joys of OCD, Fake Lashes & Roasted Brussels Sprouts

I have a confession to make. I watch The Real Housewives of Just About Everywhere (except Potomac, because honestly, I have no idea where that is…and Dallas, because I can’t start any new series during baseball season). I realized I needed to come clean with this information after a conversation with Baltimore Orioles’ manager Buck Showalter last week. Yes, you read that right. The topic came up (yes, you read that right), and I denied ever watching the show.

Now instead of searching for the answer as to why I lied to Buck about watching the Real Housewives (which is a whole other blog post), I instead went digging deep within myself as to why I actually choose to spend my spare time watching such a useless show. It didn’t take me long to figure it out.

First off, it’s useless. It’s pointless. There is no thinking involved. The storylines are so ridiculous they are comical. After a long day of work, running around and being “mommied” to death by my kids, I welcome such useless, pointless, thoughtless things. I wish I could say I spent that time studying up on the policies and platforms of our presidential candidates. It is, after all, an election year. But let’s be real.

Perhaps more importantly, the Real Housewives make me feel like the most normal human being to ever walk this planet (or at least one of them). I’ve never flipped any tables or pulled out anyone’s weave, although it has crossed my mind a time or two ;). Don’t get me wrong—I’ve had more than my fair share of regretful, humiliating moments, I’ve just never invited television cameras to come along and document them (unless you count those slip ups during commercial breaks…see my first blog post for clarification).

My point is this—right or wrong (and I’m pretty sure it’s wrong)—I use these train wrecks to make myself feel a little less train wreck-y. Which brings me to the point of this blog. If you think you are a Type A, OCD-having, neurotic mess, let me return the favor, complete with pictures.

I am so Type A that I go room to room after the housekeeper leaves to put all of the shutters at the exact same angle and return all tabletop decor to it’s proper location.

I am so OCD that I have 8 email accounts, and I don’t go to sleep before that little red circle above the email icon is gone. In fact, I kind of hyperventilate when someone’s red circle has a number with a comma in it. I mean, what if there is something really important in one of those unread emails??? Who hasn’t read THOUSANDS of emails??? It stresses me out!!!

I am so neurotic that all of my husband’s shirts have to be facing the same direction (we share a closet)…and all must be on the thin, white, wire hangers. Except for the flannel shirts. Those are heavy and require a brown cardboard hanger. When the dry cleaning comes in, all the button downs are facing the wrong direction, so I fix them. Turn the hanger around and hang in accordance to color. And all is right with the world (or at least in my closet).

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My poor husband. In my defense, he knew exactly what he was getting into. You can’t hide this level of crazy.

But I can use my Type A-ness for good, too. And this is where I might be able to help the “normal” person. At the beginning of each month, I download all the pictures from my camera and my iPhone to my computer, then upload them to a Shutterfly gallery and send them out to immediate family members. It’s a good way to make sure none of those precious photos disappear and keep loved ones in the loop!

Now cue the OCD. I order every picture that I upload and put them in chronological order in a photo album labeled by year. I want my kids to be able to look through photo albums the way I did as a kid…and I’m nuts 😉

Every picture that we have in our possession is in one of these albums. Someday we'll get bored and look at all of them. Seriously.

Every picture that we have in our possession is in one of these albums. Someday we’ll get bored and look at all of them. Seriously.

Anyway, there is some normal in my crazy, so hopefully you can take something from this post. If not, there’s always the random thought and the recipe!

Random Thought

If you’re a woman and you want to change your life in a very superficial way, get eyelash extensions. I got my first set almost five years ago, and I’ve never looked back. They’re not cheap, and it’s a total luxury, but I would give up a lot of other things before I’d give up my lashes. I don’t look like I just woke up when I don’t have makeup on, and I don’t have to spend 10 minutes applying mascara when I do wear makeup. They make me feel girlie, and I’m not very girlie. Don’t judge.

Recipe

Courtesy of my sister, Sarah. I don’t have a picture of the finished product, but I do have a picture of the text message exchange between the two of us about the recipe. Listen people, I never claimed to be Martha Stewart. #blessmyheart

You say teaspoon, I say tablespoon...

You say teaspoon, I say tablespoon…

Roasted Brussels Sprouts

Ingredients:
-2-3 dozen Brussels sprouts
-Olive oil
-Salt
-Pepper
-Balsamic vinegar
-Honey

Directions:
Cut Brussels sprouts in half (stems off). Drizzle with olive oil, salt, pepper. Roast at 425 degrees for 20 minutes, stirring occasionally.

Mix 1 tablespoon olive oil, 1 tablespoon balsamic vinegar, 1 teaspoon honey. Drizzle over roasted Brussels sprouts and serve!

5 thoughts on “The Joys of OCD, Fake Lashes & Roasted Brussels Sprouts

  1. Caroline

    Where do you get your lashes done? I want to try them this summer especially since we are going on a cruise and I don’t plan on wearing makeup but still want to look somewhat put together.

    Reply
  2. Corinne King

    Oh Emily-

    We are so the same and then so the opposite. I am one of those people that have a comma in my number of emails. (Yes that’s me). Somehow magically I do keep up with my important emails. (I keep the archives). No way am I near OCD but it does drive me insane not to be organized. So I do wish I had the motivation to be on your OCD side just a little in our crazy busy life.

    Compliments are the best, straight shooting works everywhere time, and eye lashes are happiness. ?

    Reply
  3. o0ort Ranger

    Your Story on the PowerAde bath got me started & I couldn’t stop till I’d read `em all. I’m sure there are more eloquent ways to say this but: I appreciate your wholesome perspective (with hints of naïveté & full color language), easy & straight forward narrative, generosity & courage (in sharing the tales of Emily) And your connection to my beloved Texas Rangers. I’ve been a fan of your clubhouse interviews for a very long time.

    Normally contented to remain on the sidelines you admission of OCD forced my hand. I’m blessed with this ability as well. I immediately recognized my own handiwork in your hubbies closet. Few people care to “pre-think” their labors. Ask your beloved one if it’s easier to choose his clothes each day because it’s arranged by color & pattern. I know the answer is yes even if he doesn’t realize it.

    My wife thinks it’s unnecessary for me back into every parking space but I’m convinced it’s safer & “pre-orients” the car for easier egress. In short I believe fully in healthy OCD and I’m a happier person for it.

    Lemons or Lemonade it’s all a matter of perspective. You have it Emily & thanks for sharing it with the wider world.

    Reply

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